Wanting Something More
by BlueRookie
Summary: A little one-shot to relieve my impatience, even though they deserve more complexity than this. It's a Gail and Holly make-up scene after 5x03.


Holly was agitated. She'd waited long enough. She didn't know what to say, but she knew Gail well enough by now that if Gail hadn't made the first move yet, it would be up to her. Besides, as stinging as Gail's words were, she knew she was the one who was really hurting.

She threw on her coat, grabbed her keys and opened the front door, only to find Gail standing there in the rain, soaking wet, hand in mid air on its way to the doorbell. It was hard to tell if her face was wet from the rain, or if she'd been crying.

They stood there, looking at each other for a second, before Gail blurted out, "Holly, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I said horrible things to you that weren't even true, I was just, I was so hurt by what you said." The words tumbled out in rapid succession. "I mean, I'd just told my partner that I was really serious about you, and that you were the only person who needed to know that, and then I realized I've never even told you that. What you've meant to me, how you've changed me. I have to know, if this is just something fun for you…." She shook her head as giving up. "I need to know now."

Holly pulled her inside by her jacket and quickly closed the door. "Listen to me," she said as her hands went to her face and then forehead to forehead. "I'm falling in love with you," she whispered. "It's not just fun. Gail, I am so, so sorry you heard that. I was just trying to shut Lisa up from saying stupid things, and when we were kissing before that you were saying that now you were having more fun, and it just came out."

Gail pulled away a few inches, watching her. Holly continued. "After what you said, I wasn't sure if you wanted to see me at all, even though I knew you were just hurt and lashing out, I know you feel more than that for me but I wanted to give you some space and—"

"You're falling in love with me?" Gail asked in disbelief.

"More like fallen. Past participle. Well, no, past tense. Fell, irretrievably—"

Gail pressed her mouth against Holly's, whose lips closed against hers. They slowed, eyes closed. Holly pulled away first, with Gail leaning in a little before letting go, always the one not quite willing to end that moment. That moment, when she felt so much need. Their faces stayed close.

Eyes still closed, Gail was shaking her head. "Holly, why do you want me. I'm suck a fucking mess, and Lisa's right, even if she's an asshat and doesn't know what she's talking about. Why would you want me?" she repeated.

Holly shook her head. "C'mon, let's get you out of those wet clothes." She helped her out of her jacket, took off her own, and sat Gail down on the edge of the couch. She sat on the coffee table, Gail's knees between hers, and held her hands. Gail's imploring eyes were breaking her heart.

"Hey. You are the most infinitely interesting, amazing person I've ever met. You're smart, you always seem to say something that makes me think. I have more fun with you than I've ever had with anyone. It's true, you make me laugh. Come on, you _know_ that's true."

It made Gail smile and she began to relax a little, but Holly wasn't done. "You are also so fucking hot I can barely stand it. From the moment I saw you in that ravine."

Gail looked at her questioningly, but Holly was nodding. "Yeah. And you've got the thickest fucking armor I've seen in a long time, but I can see right through it. From the beginning. You never scared me off, Gail. Then, sometimes when we're together, at night..." She looked down before raising her eyes to meet Gail's again. "You let me in with no reservation, and I realize how honored I am that you do." She swallowed the lump in her throat. "Your courage amazes me. I see your fear, and then you just conquer it. You refuse to let it win, and I am amazed."

Her eyes searched Gail's. "I've missed you _so much_." Her voice broke.

Gail pondered her words in wonderment. She didn't deserve her, but here she was. "I've fought with lovers before, but Holly, this is different. I feel different. I don't know how to do that with you. You're the last person I ever want to hurt. Before that fight, I'd just spend my time feeling how happy you make me, and wanting to make you happy. I'm afraid I don't know how to work things out with you. I'm so fucked up, and I'm scared to death I'm going to ruin this."

Holly was smiling again. She cocked her head. "You do make me happy. Happier than anyone's ever made me feel. But baby, we're people, and we've all got issues. We're going to disagree sometimes, and sometimes we're going to fight. You just have to have a little faith in how I feel about you, and we'll work it out. Trust. I know that's hard, but it's not impossible. 'Kay?"

Gail still seemed dubious. She thought of Dov's words. "You're not waiting for me to decide this isn't for me? That I'm not just trying you out, that it's some kind of phase?"

"Is it?"

"No!" She scowled at her.

Holly had to laugh again. "I know. Honey, I've known it from the beginning. I can tell by the way you kiss me, the way you touch me. I know you're serious, the way you respond to me. Someone who isn't serious about this doesn't introduce me to her brother and co-worker before we've even slept together."

Gail nodded. That was true. She knew she was serious about her the instant they kissed. Even before that, even before she was stunned by jealousy watching Holly on a date with another woman, she knew she was serious about her. In some important way.

"And, um, there are certain things you seem absolutely addicted to," she said provocatively. "To my great benefit and enjoyment, I might add."

Gail leaned in and kissed her slowly. She pulled away first, eyes heavy-lidded. "Take me to bed. Please."

They stood up and kissed again, holding each other close. Holly's eyes flickered with heat. "God, I have missed you. This." Her hands ran up Gail's sides before holding one hand in hers, and leading her up the stairs.

They undressed each other with patience. Before unclasping Holly's bra, Gail's hands lifted the cups up and off of her, feeling her substantial tits with both hands. She raised her eyebrows. "Fuck, I've missed these."

Holly caught her breath at Gail's touch, then kissed her hard. They quickly finished undressing before Holly impatiently pulled the covers off the bed part way, and they fell onto each other.

"Holly… you feel so good." Gail pressed her close, trying to get as much skin against skin as she could. Her hands were all over Holly's body, revelling in how gorgeous she was in every way.

Holly flipped her on her back. Her hand was between Gail's legs, while unconsciously sliding against Gail's thigh. Her hand went deeper. "Someone's a little wet."

Gail grinned up at her, her hands in her hair. "My thigh is not exactly dry right now, Dr. Stewart," and kissed into Holly's laugh.

Holly's lips lingered on hers for moment before she said, "I don't mean to sound crass, but that started the second I opened the door." She shrugged. "Sorry, some part of my mind goes to the gutter the second I see you." She breathed in Gail's ear, suddenly serious, groaning, "I miss this, Gail. I want to lick you clean, tongue your clit and feel it swell in my mouth…"

This elicited an immediate reaction from Gail as she bucked up against her. "Fuck, Holly." She held her tight as Holly continued what she was doing.

Holly gazed down at her, awestruck at her beauty. "Gail," she whispered, "Can I just fuck you like this for a little while first? I need to see you."

Gail opened her eyes for a second and nodded. "Don't stop, please," before squeezing her closer.

Holly had three fingers inside her and her own thigh pressing against her hand. She rocked Gail over and over, curling a finger inside her, focusing on her with that laser-like Stewart intensity that drove Gail wild and made her feel, really feel, that she mattered to her. Holly whispered into her ear that she loved her, again and again.

Gail was breathing hard, her moans more frequent and high pitched and Holly knew anything else would have to wait. For a minute it was a struggle, as Gail arched her back and bucked only to succumb to Holly's control of her, and she came nearly sobbing.

Holly's hand stayed where it was, slowing as Gail came down and her breathing eventually evened. She opened her eyes and looked deep into Holly's, still with a mixture of gratitude and wonderment.

Holly's hand came up as she rolled partially off to Gail's side, palming her breast leisurely, fingers lightly grazing her nipple, much to Gail's continuing pleasure. Their faces touched.

"So… you told your partner that you're 'really serious' about me, huh?" she asked playfully.

"I'm in love with you." Stated as a fact, without hesitation.

Startled again by her courage, Holly was at a loss for words, then she kissed her lips lightly. "Good," she whispered.

"Holly? I wake up happy every day, when I see you sleeping next to me. And if you're not, I'm happy knowing I'm gonna see you soon. It… this, is new to me. I kind of don't know what to do with it."

"Enjoy it? I do. I feel the same way, waking up next to you, or knowing I'm going to see you soon. It's like I can't wait."

"Why do you have so much faith in me that we can work out problems together?" Gail asked quizzically, in that open and honest and yes, sometimes almost cynical way that Holly adored.

"Because I know I love you, and I know you love me. And you're fearless, most of the time. Look, you ran up that tree, and you tried to cause an emergency to get out of it. Well, I'm up in the tree with you, and we're not getting down. Okay? We both like it up here. It won't always be easy, but if we're honest with each other about how we feel, I think we'll be okay. We can work things out, I know it. I have faith in us, Gail. You should, too."

Gail held her close. "Okay. You've got me. And I've got you." They nuzzled each other's necks, warm in loving arms.

Then Gail flipped Holly over, ready to feed that addiction.


End file.
